Coop's movie Reviews on Newgrounds

[Jebby Tells a Story]

Horrible flaming lazer deaths

Well, it's not got the context of some of your other work, so it was a little disappointing, but don't let that get you down. The questions from the children are pretty much spot on with the sort of awkward questions they ask of you, when you're in mid flow.

Again the voices need some work, if just for the recording quality, as the volume keeps fading in and out with Jeb's narration. The accent is pretty standard and decent, but I'm sure that some people out there could make it so that you're covered on that front.

Basic animation, that needs just a little more to evoke more emotion - try having things like moving arms and legs, rather than shaking the whole image around and then things will seem a lot better. With the lazer deaths, perhaps shoot one beam and then have the targets burst into flames?

[Review Request Club]

Battosai810 responds:

Oh man if I made this cartoon now.

There's a pretty minimal amount of character animation here, just a lot of bouncing. I didn't know motion tweens yet, so at least it's a little better than that. Also no characters have eyelids or eyebrows so there's no emotion being conveyed. Yeah.

This cartoon was still when I was into the whole "random" humor aspect with no real context. When I do that sort of humor now there's usually something setting it up rather than just diving head first into weirdness. The voicework was done with a crappy battery powered microphone a friend got from a Radio Shack in like 1995. It was later peed on by one of my cats. Thank god I have a good mic now.

[Jeb City part 2]

Will we ever see part 3?

Do the part with the whores next!

*ahem*, now that I've regained control, it seem that you've made some steps of improvement to this, compared with the first part of your tale. I would say that there need to be more time spent upon the animation, but given that it was made in 2006, I'll assume that you're better now, since you're still animating.

The voices could use some work, but the Audio Portal and Forums can find you some talented voice actors, that can do your bidding for very reasonable fees (peanuts, porn, 5% of advert revenues), as it did sound a little mumbled and rushed. The analogies were straight out of right field, but did contain enough fun in there that I could smile at what was being done here.

With the blood at the end, I was glad that it was done in the "traditional" white, just like the movie, but the splatter could use a little more work, as I'm not sure that would be how it would look. Spray, perhaps coating the walls in a fine mist, but no long, thick streaks - these happen if the body hits the wall and drags down it, for example.

I look forward to seeing what else you are capable of.

[Review Request Club]

Battosai810 responds:

At the time, hoowee was I proud of that blood effect. I thought it was the coolest damn thing. Glad you caught on that I did the white blood effect too. If I did it now you can bet there'd be some cool frame by frame splatter.

I've always liked noir dialogue and I'd love to take a semi-serious, Max Payne style stab at it. My voice acting has gotten better since this cartoon, although I'm by no means a great voice actor. I have voices that I develop for my characters and I don't really see me changing them though. These come in more in my newer cartoons.

Thanks for watching this cartoon, and I hope you enjoy Part 3 (which came out like 6 months-a year later) even more!

[Jeb City part 1]

Good interpretation

Well, despite the fact that we're swimming back through the mists of time here, this still rings true with the film "Sin City" and, while you've thrown in some obscure references, such as the quadriplegic llama. I think that this can get a little distracting, though it is quite funny in a sense.

The animation and the sound, I have no doubt has improved over the years, so I'll see that over the next few flash I watch of yours. I would have suggested that you spent more time getting the animation sorted, as it looked a little disjointed, when you had the bad guy run with baby, before he threw her off a cliff.

The sparing use of colour is brilliant, though I think you could have used more white in the background of these pieces, to set the scene a little closer to Miller's comics.

[Review Request Club]

Battosai810 responds:

I thought for a while of remaking these cartoons with the techniques you'll see in my later animations, but that's nothing on my priority list.

I do wish I did a bit more with the whites, as the balance is all black. I would also love to have the really angular art style that Miller used in some of Sin City, and the cool camera angles. If I had enough time, there's about a million different ways I'd love to tell this silly story. Glad you enjoyed the cartoon for what it is though.

[Annoying Orange: Cartoon!]

Pretty annoying

Well, the joke was pretty much like it said on the tin, annoying. Even when he gets stabbed, it wasn't that much of a relief.

Right, what needs to be worked on here? You've got a decent setup of the mouth sets that you want to use, but there seems to be an issue with the tweening in that the pieces need to move too far - perhaps a middle frame to tween to would help? That could help you to get the lip sync right, which would improve this flash no end. On top of that, will we ever see the annoying orange again, or will there just be a glass of OJ making these appalling jokes?

When it bleeds, the spurts of juice would die down a little and would probably splatter more, as in across the scenery and even over the hand - the dynamics of a bleed when the knife is in the wound is fantastically different to how it goes when the knife is removed. (The great stuff you can learn from forensics lectures)

[Review Request Club]

up-a-notch responds:

umm thanks

[Teacher's Cake]

Good, but needs work

I love the joke that you used at the end - straight out of Malachy's BBS Signature ;)

Still, what we have here is a great concept, but it was really lacking in places and as a result, I marked it down. You cut corners with the animation - when Mr. Landis enters the room and double takes the fat kid that ate the cake. You ran this loop a few times over and it really ruined the effect for me, personally. The same could be said for the fact that the characters stopped lip-synch about a tenth of the way through the piece. If you're not going to lip-sync, then don't, but equally, don't do a whole piece, where they do some and not for the rest. If you're trying to say that they are thinking, have them look thoughtful - eyes towards the ceiling, stroke their chin, or something like that.

Perhaps, you would have had more of a reaction from the class, that looked a little wooden, as if you're just sitting them in the background for filler material - they wouldn't sit perfectly still in real life, so why have them do that here.

Finally, we come to the audio - it needs to be better quality - move slightly further from the mic an see what you can do. Failing that, go to the Audio Forum and search for the voice actors wanted thread, where you can get some specialists in for it.

You're getting there, but aren't quite home yet.

[Review Request Club]

EKublai responds:

Thanks for the review Coop!

[Orange tells a joke]

Can't believe I listened

Sorry man, I really can't believe I listened to that ear rape of a joke. My reaction would be similar to Strawberry's but then I couldn't really tell what he was on about.

Give us subtitles and do something about the drawing. Perhaps even animate the joke, but that would be a lot to ask of a Clock Day flash, I suppose.

[Review Request Club]

Auz responds:

Sorry Coop :(

I'll try to do my best next time.